Tuesday, November 15, 2005


When I was in second grade and I saw a pretty girl, the prettier she was the more difficult it was for me to come up with something to talk to her about.

In my silence, the best I could do was shoot her a crosseyed goofy look on my face.

She'd laugh.

I'd get laid.

All was good.

Okay, maybe I didn't get laid - it was only second grade for crissakes!

This type of behavior on my part hasn't changed dramatically.

However, what did change eventually is the success rate. It was a sliding scale gradually becoming less effective over the last decade or so, where this radical change happens between men and women. I'm not exactly sure at what point it all happens - and it varies with each person- but typically the "shift" happens for people between 20 and 22.

Before this shift, Girls are smart about everything EXCEPT boys. Conversely, Boys are smart about NOTHING but girls. Then the rolls get really jumbled and as girls get smarter about boys, boys get dumber and more clueless with girls. As this happens and boys get smarter about other things, this makes them more nerdy- which for many girls who are now smarter about boys, isn't as appealing. For the really smart girls, this is appealing but the field became so wide that they have lots of guys to choose from.

My dad says that it was much easier to successfully meet girls (and have "relations") in 1968 than it was in 1981 (the year before he met my mom and the year I learned what divorce meant, respectively). I laughed and explained my above theory.

I told him that he shouldn't feel so alone- I've now joined his ranks.

If you are a girl and see a guy shoot you a goofy crosseyed look on his face, you should laugh and go talk to him because chances are he's a really nice guy. And he thinks you're cute. And it might be me.