WORD TO THE WISE(MEN)

When a female prefaces something with, "I know this might sound a little bitchy," take the following action immediately:

1) Take one hand and cover your throat.
2) Take the other hand and cover your nuts.
3) Turn sideways

You're about to be served one of the most scathing and hurtful insults you have ever been dealt. Sure, she might pepper the ensuing statement with sugar coated words that gently disguise it - but make no mistake: She's got a dagger in her hand and she's aiming to slash your throat and cut off your wedding tackle.

That is all.